Not having insurance coverage to help us pay for the treatments and drugs we need to help us get pregnant has been incredibly difficult and has limited us in what we are able to do going forward. We've spent upwards of $25,000 since starting this whole process. We've been incredibly blessed to have family help us along the way, and an incredible team of doctors who have been willing to work with us financially to pay off our treatments each month.
After many weeks of tears, prayers and a lot of soul searching, Scott and I have decided to move to an egg donor. Our doctor told us it would boost our chances of getting pregnant by almost 60%.
What a great statistic, right?
I have to be honest and say we didn't come to this decision easily. I couldn't seem to get over the fact of never having my own biological child. Never hearing someone say "Your daughter has your eyes" or "Your son has your smile". I kept thinking back to my childhood when people would tell me "you look just like your Mom". It gave me a huge sense of security as a child. It's hard to explain, but I feared my child would want that same sense of security and attachment.
I called my Mom in tears one night, after trying to picture myself having to tell someone that my child didn't actually have the same hair or eyes as me - then having to explain that my husband and I had used an egg donor with similar physical features as me. How awkward of a conversation would that be? Would I have to tell my child that I wasn't really their Mother? That I just carried them in my belly for nine months? Would they want to meet their "egg mother" someday?
She stopped me and said, "Dianne, even if that child doesn't have your eyes, or the same color hair, he or she is still yours....100%. What's more important - passing along physical traits to your child or teaching them to be a good person. Showing them how to be kind and compassionate. You're going to supply that baby with nutrients for 9 months. They will be your baby, even if you don't look a like"
I took a deep breath and realized how lucky I was to have a Mother to teach me how to love and the true meaning of "Motherhood".
So we are ready to move forward in our pursuit to Baby Chatterton! But we need your help!
We've started a fundraiser to help us move forward with the egg donor process.
I realize many people may not agree with our decision to seek help from a fundraiser. But I can assure you, this is the only way we know how to fight through this journey. I know most will never understand what infertility truly feels like, and to be honest, I hope no one ever will - I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. Infertility is a disease. And for some there is no cure - especially those without the necessary insurance coverage to help pay for drugs and treatment.
We hope you'll visit our page and help us bring home the missing piece to our hearts.
Click below to view our page
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